I Heard The News Today, Oh Boy....

Just found out a boy I used to hang out with after school in high school died. He was friends with my ex, Colin, and also with my friend, Dex. We would play games in Dex's basement and chill out. I didn't know him well enough to call him a friend, nor did I know him well enough to recognize him on the street. But I remember him. I remember feeling like the responsible adult when we hung out, and I remember how I felt like those boys were my responsibility while we were together. After all, I was two years older than them, and I was always the person who thought of consequences and rationality.

Anyway, he was in a one car accident. His car flipped and he slammed into a pole and live electrical wires were all over the vehicle and it took an hour to shut off power before responders could get into the car and pronounce him dead. There is no idication that he was under the influence of anything, and they are speculating that he might have fallen asleep since it was 4:00 in the morning when it happened. They won't know for sure what killed him until they do an autopsy. I hope it was fast, but I don't know if there is such a thing as an instant death. One second can seem like an eternity...

It reminds me of my friend, Tim, from college. I got a call in October of 2005 from a stranger. He introduced himself and told me he found my number in Tim's phone, and he wanted to let me know that Tim had died four days earlier when a drunk driver slammed into his vehicle on the driver's door as he was driving home late from work, and that it all happened in an instant. Then he got choked up, and told me he was sorry and serivces were the following day in Trenton, and he gave me a time and place and hung up.

I'd barely registered his first sentence.

It was then that it struck me just how quickly things change and how fragile all of my friendships are. So many of the people I care about keep in touch from a long distance, and if that one guy didn't think to call every number listed in Tim's phone I'd never have known what happened to him. I didn't even know he had my number. We mostly kept in touch through email and instant messages.

Anyway, that's that. Dex gave me the news but Colin never said anything to me. I told Dex that if he ever needed me for anything I would always be there for him. He always knew that before, but I wanted to make it clear that the offer still stands. I'm a little sad Colin never told me, but it's understandable.

Hell, I didn't tell anyone about Tim for a month. Not even my parents or brother.