The Captain has abandoned ship, and Shy is moving to another state. My boys are leaving me. It… hurts. It’s not like there aren’t other guys I’m close with, but I’ve loved the Captain for years, and Shy… There may not have been anything between us, but there was potential. He’s the kind of guy I could hang out with and share intimate (platonic) physical closeness with. And if we’d gotten the chance to get to that point, who knows what might have transpired? He's the first guy since the Captain that I've felt I might let my guard down with and allow myself to fall for.
I know it was selfish, but I was thinking that Shy would play a major role in me getting over the Captain. It would have helped to get closer to another guy while the other shrank away into darkness. But with Shy leaving, there’s nothing special pulling me out of the Captain’s grasp and I’m afraid that maybe he will pull me down into the darkness with him. I know I’m strong. I know I can will myself to pull through anything. I was just hoping that this time I might have some outside help.
I hate distance. It consumes the soul of a friendship and vanquishes all hope.
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2 comments:
In what way is Captain Pugwash jumping ship? I've probably said it before, but boys are stupid.
He has replaced me with a girl 4 years younger (thus six yeasrs younger than him) and in the process completely forgot how to be my friend. We barely talk anymore. I mean, we talk frequently, but he holds back and hides stuff.
Also: is it terrible that I had to use google to find out who Captain Horatio Pugwash is? Probably not, seein' as I'm not British. =P
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